We like to believe we lead from logic. In reality, almost every decision starts as an emotion and only later collects its arguments.

How an emotion becomes a "fact"

The danger isn't the feeling — it's the conclusion we draw from it instantly and invisibly.

An investor says no → "the market doesn't believe in us"
A deadline slips → "the team is disengaged"
A client leaves → "our strategy is failing"

In each case an emotional reaction quietly turns into something that looks like objective reality. I call it an EMU (emotional meaning unit) — the meaning we unconsciously assign to an emotional trigger and then mistake for truth.

A personal example

When I launched my first company in 2014 — a platform for buying digital assets with bank cards — I was sure money was the motivation. Venture fund by day, 7 a.m. to midnight, 50 minutes by bicycle each way, and genuine joy in that rhythm.

The surprise came later: the seventh car in a small collection, most goals achieved — and overwhelming anxiety. What I had actually been chasing was not money but permission to be myself and feel the full spectrum of emotion, whatever label the mind put on it.

The same pattern showed up in the product. Data contradicted our hypothesis, and my first EMU was: "the matching algorithm isn't accurate enough." After investing in the algorithm, I saw the real cause — users' unconscious behavior diverged from their stated preferences. That insight reshaped the product.

How to step out of an EMU

Paradoxically, more rational decisions begin with acknowledging emotion, not suppressing it.

Name the feeling. Before the data: what am I feeling right now? Fear? Anxiety? Anger? Resentment? Guilt?
Stay with it in the body for a few minutes, breathing steadily. No analysis, no judgment — just awareness.
Return to the facts and ask: is this decision based on evidence, or on a feeling operating beneath my awareness?

Every emotionally charged event is practice. The better you separate feelings from facts, the cleaner your decisions become — in business and in life.

The full article is published in Forbes: EMU: The Hidden Narrative Distorting Your Leadership Decisions.

If this resonates, start with the life purpose test or apply for a session.